I’ve been beating myself up lately for not being happy all the time. I’ve been fighting any none happy feelings that have been coming up. And they have of course been coming up; frustration, anger, annoyance, confusion, sadness, lethargy. They’ve been coming up because I’m human, and stuff happens that makes you feel certain things.
Oddly, and I’m pretty sure I’m not alone in this, if I’m not feeling continuously joyful and happy I feel like I’m failing. But as I write that, it occurs to me that I can’t actually think of a period in my life when I’ve been continuously happy. Even in amazing times like when I lived on the West Coast of Australia, or when I first moved to London and was inspired by everything, or when I explored Central America for two months, I didn’t feel only happy. I felt all the feelings. Because that’s what’s actually more usual human behaviour. We feel the full spectrum.
The problem with chasing continuous happiness is that it will elude us. We can’t be happy all the time. And so in not feeling happy all the time we feel like we’re failing, like we’re doing life wrong. But we’re not. We’re experiencing our full human range.
The key, I believe, is to acknowledge the happy moments when they arise. I’ve noticed a few sparks of happiness lately, and although I’m also feeling many other things, I have been able to acknowledge and feel gratitude for those little moments when my heart has lifted a bit, where I’ve felt optimistic and hopeful.
Happiness is of course, a lovely thing to experience. But we are emotional cauldrons where happiness is just one piece of the puzzle. As Rumi says, ‘be grateful for whatever comes. Because each has been sent as a guide from beyond.’
With love as always, Hannah and Team Bird
Photo by Aaron Burden on Unsplash